Guide from erstmalreden.de
Help for relatives
If you are worried about someone, you do not need to find the perfect solution immediately. Calm, concrete support often helps more than pressure.
First contact & finding words
In short
- What this page is about
- What you can do if you are worried about someone and do not know how to help.
- This may fit if
- you worry about someone and want to support them calmly.
- Looking for something else?
- If the person or others are in immediate danger, get real help now.
- If you do just one thing
- Name what you observe calmly.
Speak carefully
A concrete, non-judging sentence can be: "I have been a bit worried about you lately and wanted to hear how you are really doing. You do not have to tell me anything, but I am here."
What tends to help
Name what you observe calmly, ask open questions, accept pauses, offer one small concrete step, and stay reliable. It is okay if the person does not open up immediately.
What often does not help
Avoid sentences like "pull yourself together", "others have it worse", or "just think positive". They can increase shame, even if they are meant kindly.
Do not become solely responsible
You may get support yourself. The BApK SeeleFon offers anonymous phone and email support for relatives of people with mental health conditions in Germany. A counseling center, TelefonSeelsorge, family doctor, or crisis service may also fit. In immediate danger, call 112. You do not have to carry a crisis alone.
Act immediately on warning signs
If someone wants to harm themselves, is unreachable, seems acutely endangered, or you see immediate danger, call 112.
Updated: July 11, 2026 · Sources checked: July 11, 2026
Sources and notes
What you can do now
If you only wanted information
This guide may fit as a next step: What is a crisis?
Open articleIf you want to try first contact
Use the sentence helper or copy one short sentence. First contact does not have to be perfect.
Prepare a sentenceIf it has become urgent
Then reading more is not the priority. Open urgent help or call 112 in Germany if there is immediate danger.
Open urgent help- Name what you observe calmly.
- Offer support without pressure.
- Get real help in danger.
This page offers orientation and words for first contact. If you need counseling, therapy, or emergency help, real contact points matter.